HUMORSCOPES Week of 10/16/11 May The Farce be with You!
20 Oct 2011 Leave a Comment
in Funny Horoscopes, Humorscopes, Parody of Horoscopes Tags: astrology, farce, funny horoscopes, humorscopes, psychic services, T. Renee Richardson
Sponsor: T. Renee Richardson, www.psychic-services.com
Theme Music this week:
Aries (March 21 – April 19) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks all the pages of your library books together. Use The Farce to diplomatically explain things to the librarian, and have your card reinstated.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks all of your cabinet doors shut. Use The Farce to just move somewhere else.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks all of your past lives onto your vision board. Use The Farce to find a new therapist.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks one of your rollatizer wheels sideways, such that it operates much like a woogety woogety cart. Use The Farce to work it into some new choreography.
Leo (July 23 – August 22) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks your mind in the Wayback Machine. Use The Farce to pry it open, no matter what it takes.
Virgo (August 23 – September 22) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks your index cards together. Use The Farce to recreate the information and store it on your hard drive.
Libra (September 23 – October 22) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks Cuzins Guido & Sal together! Use The Farce to find an appropriate healer to handle this mess. Happy Birthday!
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks all the kids in the neighborhood to your front yard. Use The Farce to diplomatically explain things to the authorities, and have your license reinstated.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks all of your paperwork together, into a fuchsia folder, no less. Use The Farce and Carson to mechanically mend the monstrous mess.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks all your supplies onto the floor of your back seat. Use The Farce to hide the mess when you take your vehicle in for a trade-in evaluation.
Aquarius (January 20 – February 18) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks to your inner titanium. Use The Farce to transmute it into healing energy. Be bop a loo la scooby doobie wop bop!
Pisces (February 19 – March 20) – The newly discovered planet E-6000 enters your chart this week and sticks your hair into a tight mullet. Use The Farce to work it into a Halloween costume.
